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| Election time: Bozo the Clown for President, anyone? |
And then there were
five.
In a presidential
race that more resembles an episode of “Survivor” than a nation-shaping
election, Republican presidential candidate and resident “that-one-guy” Jon
Huntsman announced today that he was ending his campaign, which means we’re now
left with only five candidates to giggle uncontrollably at.
Contestant number
one: Mitt Romney. When thinking about Mitt Romney’s place atop the Republican
primary field, I think to an old Chinese proverb: when Romney is winning, rock bottom you have hit.
Okay, maybe that
isn’t a Chinese proverb, but it certainly should be, because the Republican
primaries have indeed hit rock bottom. At this point, the former Massachusetts
governor has cemented his place atop the Republican field, thus putting the
biggest bull’s-eye imaginable on the back of his head, and the other candidates
have begun shooting.
Not that it’s hard
to smear Mitt Romney. From his record at the helm of a big, bad corporation to
his questionable economic and foreign policies, Mitt Romney practically smears
himself (speaking of smearing oneself, I’ll talk about Rick Santorum next
week), and according to the Super-PAC that formerly belonged to Stephen
Colbert, “If Mitt Romney believes that corporations are people, then Mitt
Romney is a serial killer.”
In my opinion, as
of right now, it looks like an Obama-Romney 2012 showdown is inevitable. Thankfully,
however, that won’t stop the other candidates from acting like baboons. My only
hope is that Romney’s pick for vice president can at least have a crazy-off
with Joe Biden. May I suggest Bozo the clown?
- By Jack Childress
| Photo courtesy of Larry Harmon Pictures Corp. / Indiana News Center |
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