Josh's Chisled Wrist & Pencil

By Joshua Hong 

Staff Writer 

   Number two pencils were all our first type of pencils, but is it now the beginning of the reign of mechanical pencils? The conquest of the mechanical pencils was swift and strong; they engulfed the whole country in one power swing. People were intrigued by this new lean (lead), clean, writing machine, but was this actually the truth? Everyone was led to believe that this was a better, more efficient new alternative to our beloved number two pencils, but we were WRONG!

OH HI CATHY'S BROTHER

By Arthur Chang
Staff Writer 

   Siblings at Webb are not uncommon. Being a younger sibling at Webb you get compared to a lot even held to the standards of your sister. Throughout my time, I have heard “Oh your Cat’s younger brother we should call you Kitty” “If Cathy shaved off her heard I swear she would look just like you” and even an occasional “Oh, hi Cathy."

Allen West

By Allen Stewart 

Editor of Centerfold 

 

    If I had the confidence, personality and life of Kanye West and how it would affect my day, the morning of the change would be so drastic it would nearly mirror the way I changed the music game. Me being a creative genius and all I would not step out of bed but more so…glide out of bed. I would land on my rug designed as an air strip into my snake skin loafers because everyone knows I only ride first class. I’d walk down stairs and be greeted by my chef. I would give him a hand five but automatically purell them. The reason being is simply…..I can’t get sick. 

Blogging the presidential race: part one

Election time: Bozo the Clown for President, anyone?

   And then there were five.

   In a presidential race that more resembles an episode of “Survivor” than a nation-shaping election, Republican presidential candidate and resident “that-one-guy” Jon Huntsman announced today that he was ending his campaign, which means we’re now left with only five candidates to giggle uncontrollably at.

   Contestant number one: Mitt Romney. When thinking about Mitt Romney’s place atop the Republican primary field, I think to an old Chinese proverb: when Romney is winning, rock bottom you have hit.

   Okay, maybe that isn’t a Chinese proverb, but it certainly should be, because the Republican primaries have indeed hit rock bottom. At this point, the former Massachusetts governor has cemented his place atop the Republican field, thus putting the biggest bull’s-eye imaginable on the back of his head, and the other candidates have begun shooting.

   Not that it’s hard to smear Mitt Romney. From his record at the helm of a big, bad corporation to his questionable economic and foreign policies, Mitt Romney practically smears himself (speaking of smearing oneself, I’ll talk about Rick Santorum next week), and according to the Super-PAC that formerly belonged to Stephen Colbert, “If Mitt Romney believes that corporations are people, then Mitt Romney is a serial killer.”

   In my opinion, as of right now, it looks like an Obama-Romney 2012 showdown is inevitable. Thankfully, however, that won’t stop the other candidates from acting like baboons. My only hope is that Romney’s pick for vice president can at least have a crazy-off with Joe Biden. May I suggest Bozo the clown? 

- By Jack Childress 

Photo courtesy of Larry Harmon Pictures Corp. / Indiana News Center